faux pas, faux ever

If you ever read here that I'm having a meeting which involves speaking to a builder or any type of construction type person, please feel free to pray for me, light a candle, send me good vibes, whatever you think might work.  I need all the help I can get.

{lovely timber floor and stuff.}

We have just had our very first meeting with a prospective builder, along with the architect and I did not cover myself in glory.

That is,  I'm assuming the sentence "You're sure he won't mind if I just start licking his wood?"  is not considered the ideal way to portray oneself as a professional, sober-minded, no-nonsense client.

In my defence, the builder had just suggested a timber supplier whom he thought would have a great selection of wood flooring and the best way to see what colour it would turn out is to spit on the timber.  Do you see what I did?  I took a perfectly sensible piece of advice and completely innocently {I pinky promise swear!!} turned it into a stomach churning, blush-inducing double entendre.  You could have heard a pin drop.  I was wondering why all the men at the table were looking at me with a "what the??" look on their faces.   I'm still DYING just thinking about it 48 hours later.  I will be forever grateful that Dave, against his normal form, bit his tongue until it bled and didn't run with it.  He loves me. 

I think this whole building a house scenario is going to be an exercise in humiliation on a previously unimagined scale.  And I can imagine a LOT of humiliation.  

Love you more than my concealer,

Meredy xo